How to Kill a Mockingbird

The other week I sat down with a book in my hand.  I hadn't done that in a while and the kids got excited and asked me to read it to them.

"To Kill a Mockingbird isn't really a kids' book," I said, but they begged and I figured they'd get bored soon, so I started reading.

They were hooked.  Damon especially.  He started reading it to himself at night, which was great, because then when I'd edit out words while reading to the girls, he'd make comments like, "Mom left out the N-word."

"Whats the N-word?"

"A mean word for a black person."

"Ohhh.  That's why chigger sounds like a swear word to me." (We've all got chigger bites.  They're 10 times worse than mosquito bites.  Don't go outside in Kansas without plenty of DEET, people.)

Every day I hoped I wouldn't get the, "Mom, read us 'How to Kill a Mockingbird,'" request.  But I did.

Finally we got to the chapter where Scout beats up Francis.  "What's a whore-lady?"

"Uh, well, a woman who commits some pretty serious sins."

"Like what?"

"Well, she sells her body for money."

"How could she sell her body for money?"

"I don't want to discuss it."

Fortunately, Uncle Jack and Atticus's conversation about Maycombe's disease bored the girls and I was able to get the girls to give up Mockingbird without too much of a fight.

Tangential: Raise your hand if you think the coming forth of Harper Lee's 'new' book sounds fishy.  I'm excited to read it, but the library wait-list probably stretches into 2025.  I just hope it was really written by Harper Lee and not her editor or somebody else looking for a buck.

Why Sam's Club Is Better than Costco

(This applies to the Overland Park, KS area.)

1. Better hours.  If you get the expensive membership, you should get perks.  Like being able to shop at 8:30 in the morning after you drop kids off at school.

2. Aisles are labelled.

3. Self checkout.

4. You can use your Discover card and rack up cash-back bonus points.

5. Better hours.  Costco wasn't open on the the 4th of July.  I hate it.  It's like they care about their employees more than they care about me.  I might as well be living in Europe.  Call me a selfish, evil capitalist.  I don't care.

6. The milk jugs at Costco are ridiculous.  I should take a picture. 

7. Costco eggs are more ridiculous.  I don't want to pay an exorbitant amount for 24 organic eggs, but I don't need 48 cheap eggs.

Why Costco is better than Sam's Club:

1. It's closer to my house.

2. Their boxes of granola bars don't include the gross, low-fat marshmallow ones no one in my family likes.

Costco better be serious about their "Satisfaction Guaranteed" membership.  I'm going back to Sam's.

The Church's Response to Supreme Court Legalizing Same-Sex Marriage

You've probably already read it  here.

Towards the end it reads, "Members who . . . have doctrinal questions should make a diligent effort, including earnest prayer and scripture study, to find solutions and answers themselves."

I know that is true.  Sometime around 2010, when we were living in Logan, UT, I was struggling with the Family Proclamation.  I wondered if the Church leaders had made a mistake.  (This is not a struggle my parents or grandparents would have had.  Bob Dylan was right: these times, they are a-changin'.)

One day I knelt by my bed and prayed about it, asking if maybe the Church leaders were wrong.  After the prayer, I looked down at the floor and saw my scriptures.  I opened them up and my eyes were drawn to these words in verse 4 of D&C section 32: "Give heed to that which is written, and pretend to no other revelation."  I knew through the Spirit this was my answer.  Also, there are more than 4600 pages in my quad.  The chances of my accidentally opening my scriptures to that exact page and my eyes accidentally going to those exact words are pretty slim.

Finally, I know God loves me.  He has given me help no one else ever has or ever could.  I know He loves all His children.  And I will trust that in His own due time, He "shall wipe away all tears."

Anne's Baptism

Julia tried to sing with Anne, Claire and Zannah.  That's not what they had practiced so Claire pushed her away.  Julia threw herself on the floor and sobbed.  It's hard to be excluded.

"Charlotte," you ask, "why didn't you do your hair? Baptisms are important occasions."  I don't know. Don't ask rude questions.

Julia

Words:

No (Metta taught her to say this with conviction.)
No (Nose)
Eye
Bubbles
Dada
Mama
Doggie/Goggie
Hi
Bye-Bye
Moo
Ssss (for worm or snake)
E-I-E-I-O
Baa Baa (and then she tries to sing the rest of 'Baa, Baa, Black Sheep, Have You Any
     Wool').  It's cute.
Bug
Ella (Nutella)
Car
Shoes
Poop
Pee
Go
Mine
Bandy (Band-Aid)
Owie

She loves Band-Aids with all her heart.  She would gladly get scrapes every day of her life if it meant she could get another Band-Aid, which now she can't because we're all out.

The older kids still adore her and are so thrilled when she'll hug them good-night.

Julia loves iPads and iPhones and Nutella.  She has had way more sugar and screen time than the other kids got at her age, which should make me feel bad but doesn't.

There's my dad holding Metta and Julia in our Leawood, KS kitchen. 

new lows

Last week was the last week of school.  Jake was in England.  I was still recovering from the month of April, which I'll write about sometime soon.  I was pooped. 

Saturday night, it was 7:30 and Claire reminded me we hadn't eaten dinner yet.  I cooked some penne pasta and felt like a champ for getting some vegetables on the table.  But then, as I was taking the noodles to the table, the pan slipped and the noodles went all over the floor.  I just stood there staring.  Maybe the kids sensed I was nearing nuclear melt-down.  Maybe Claire couldn't violate the "Dinner has to be eaten before 8:00" rule.  I don't know.  But those kids said, "It's okay, Mom," and ATE OFF THE FLOOR.  As luck would have it, and before you start dry-heaving, be informed I had wiped up the floor in that spot earlier in the day.  Not that that prevented comments like, "I can't eat this one--there's something gross on it."

non-traditonal multiplication cards

One of my kids can't memorize multiplication facts the old-fashioned way.  Doesn't matter how many times we go through the flash cards, after 24 hours the facts are gone from the brain, leading to frustration all around.

We tried Right Brain Multiplication Cards from Diane Craft.  I'll give her this: it's a good idea.  I'll give you this: if your kid has this same problem, have the kid make up their own cards.  Trust me, his/her drawings will be just as good.  If he/she/you is/are an artist, they'll be much better.  Or do what we did, and don't make cards; just make up stories.

We like Harry Potter here, so I assigned every number a Harry Potter character.  For example: 7 is Ginny Weasley, 4 is Dumbledore, and 9 is Hermione.  The story that goes with 7 x 7 = 49 is this: Ginny said to herself, "Dumbledore must like Hermione more than me.  That's why he left her a book in his will.  He didn't leave me anything!"  Don't worry what morals your stories teach.  The objective is to get the facts memorized, and this works for my kid.   There.  I just saved you $35.

July 2015 update: never mind.  This idea doesn't stick much better than anything else.  I want to give up.